Analysis of Love is Blind Sweden on Netflix

Netflix Show “Love is Blind” is a remarkably interesting concept and a serious Reality TV. I watched 3 seasons of the American Original version, and I analyzed in depth all couples and relationships. The idea behind it is to confirm Scientific research, which affirms that Love is not based on looks and Physique. There are 4 countries versions of “Love is Blind” [1]: USA[2], Brazil [3], Japan [4], Sweden [5] and one for the MENA region.

Now, for this article, we will analyze the Sweden Version.

Karolina & Lucas

Karolina, a payroll controller[6] [7] [8] and ESFP, who relies all the time on her sexy body and very revealing clothes, came to this experiment looking for Love and maybe some fame on TV. As an ESFP, she has Extroverted Sensing Se as her dominant cognitive function. Se is linked to the desire to show beauty and flashy things to the world, to do physical work, and to talk about material things. Hence, only the talking part is left in the experiment. She can’t show her body and her dresses. She can’t sexually seduce by her revealing clothes, her touch, or her movements. It’s hard specifically for her. Her primary tactic to seduce men can’t be applied.

The first part of the “Love is Blind” process is that a man and a woman talk to each other from different Pods without seeing each other. The Pods are rooms with a couch and a wall separating the two people, but they can clearly hear each other. Their conversations are recorded and some parts are aired and revealed on the TV show.

Karolina, being used to be liked for her appearance, didn’t have options in this experiment. Only one guy, Lucas, about whom she always complained that he was very shy. He was the only one who could keep up with her. He’s an Operative Manager in Energy Production and an INFP. With his emotional intelligence, he could connect with her emotionally. His first function Introverted feeling Fi connected to her second function Fi. So, they both have Fi and the same decision-making functions. This makes them understand each other naturally. However, their preferences and interests are vastly different: Her dominant Se is attuned to the material and physical worlds. For him, Si, the introverted Sensing function is in 3^rd position competing with Extroverted Intuition Ne in 2^nd position.

Karolina’s cognitive functions model: 1^st Se, 2^nd Fi, 3^rd Te, 4^th Ni.

Lucas model: 1^st Fi, 2^nd Ne, 3^rd Si, 4th Te.

Hence the importance of the Sensory (S) heavily differs from Karolina to Lucas. Also, she has extroverted thinking Te as her 3^rd function Vs Te in 4^th position for Lucas. Te is a masculine function. Karolina has a better Te than him. She’s more masculine than him in this aspect. In addition, Se is a cognitive igniter for Physical power. So physically, Karolina with Se first has more potential physically than Lucas with his Si third, responsible for physical resilience.

Now we can see that Lucas and Karolina have impactful differences cognitively. Considering theory alone, this couple has no chance of building a successful romantic relationship.

Amanda & Sergio

To have a good transition, let’s move on to a similar couple but now the man is Sergio, ESFP and the Woman is Amanda,  INFP.

Amanda, INFP: 1^st Introverted Feeling Fi, 2^nd Extroverted Intuition Ne,  3^rd Introverted Sensing Si, 4^th Extroverted Thinking Te.

Sergio, ESFP: 1^st  Extroverted Sensing Se, 2^nd  Fi, 3^rd Te, 4^th Introverted Intuition Ni.

INFP women usually have a successful relationship with ESTJ men. Nowadays, there are many couples of INFP woman + ESTJ man. They both belong to the same quadra [9], which groups personality types that have the exact same cognitive functions but in different orders. In Socionics, this quadra is called the Delta Quadra[10] [11].
The ESTJ cognitive model is 1^st Te, 2^nd Si, 3^rd Ne, 4^th Fi.

He’s obviously different than ESFP even if they both have Te and Fi. How the ESFP man will connect to the INFP woman?

The axis Fi-Te is first for Amanda and Second for Sergio. So, they can understand each other with the same decision-making functions. However, Sergio, as an ESFP, doesn’t have a thinking function or an intuitive function among his top 2 cognitive functions. This makes him intellectually inferior to her. He has a lot more physical potential than her thanks to his 1^st Se function Vs her 3^rd Si function. He has a satisfactory level of emotional intelligence thanks to his 2^nd Fi function Vs her first Fi function. So, she has more emotional intelligence than him, but as a woman, she’s expected to understand emotions better and he’s not far thanks to his Fi in 2nd position.

He’s better than her on the management level with his 3^rd Te Vs her 4^th Te. This makes him a lot more masculine than her. The third function is used a lot more than the 4^th function. Plus, Sergio, as a man, is expected by Society to be better in management skills. I know some women are offended by this Superiority in management. I didn’t say I agree with Society on this, but this is the reality so far no matter how women got better at management and are getting more dominant roles. Psychologically, this is a masculine trait and only women who have a strong masculine side have really an issue with it. A woman can be a remarkably successful influencer, but this doesn’t contradict her femineity. However, taking charge and commanding people is a masculine trait. A woman needs to be masculine to be able to do this and have this Lifestyle. There is nothing wrong with a masculine woman but psychologically only a few can be masculine “successfully” without psychological issues. Of course, without forgetting that every man and woman has a masculine side and a feminine side. When I say Masculine woman, I mean mostly masculine. Same for a feminine man.

In our case, the INFP Amanda is Feminine and is looking for a masculine man. The ESFP Sergio is masculine thanks to his Te but also Feminine thanks to and because of his 2^nd Fi.

So, he’s obliged to lean heavily on his 3rd Te to keep the sexual attraction alive between him and her. The main issue in this couple is the intellectual side. The ESFP Sergio is a lot more practical and, using his own words in the show, superficial, whereas Amanda the INFP is more abstract ideas oriented and is more disconnected from Reality and Daily Life. My thesis is: considering theory alone and just the fact that she appears taller than him, a lot better looking, and he has no physical dominance in his physical appearance over her, this relationship can be very challenging unless some needs are compensated by money and resources.

 Lucas & Emilia

To rest from the failed Relationships (Haha! I’m joking), let’s see a hopeful and inspiring couple. Our INFP man Lucas with an ESTJ woman, Emilia. Just in theory, this couple has the potential to work. But why? A question whose answer is worth a million dollars!!

ESTJ women are rare and have a big difficulty finding a partner and being in a romantic relationship. Also, they are masculine and incredibly good at business and management in general. Maybe they will pay me this 1 million dollars as I am writing the answer now! Haha!

First, I gave off the two ideal partners in theory for them. He’s the sweet INFP man. Well, Sweet for them anyway. Although the ESTJ woman is masculine and the INFP man is Feminine, the ESTJ woman falls deeply in Love with the INFP man. The unique way he makes her feel and his creative, intellectual side allows her to value him a lot. His feminine side is attractive to her masculine side. They are their dominant sides. Unfortunately, in the show, Lucas doesn’t have a physical attraction towards Emilia after meeting her.

Lucas has a rare personality type for men, INFP man. Emilia has a rare personality for women, an ESTJ woman. So, they differ from the stereotypical men and women.

Stereotypical men & women

Most women are stronger emotionally than most men [12]–[16]. Women relatively are “highly emotional” in general, but they have the capacity to process effectively their emotions[17]–[19]. Whereas men don’t show a lot of emotions, but they have a hard time processing them in general. When a man participates in a Love Reality TV and spends alone time with some woman, we can see clearly how the man becomes vulnerable and emotional, especially when dealing with a woman who has a lot of experience with her emotions and becomes resilient over time.

 Of course, this is a generalization for men and women, but is valid for the majority. In “personality types” language, most men have a highly positioned thinking function in the 1^st and 2^nd positions in their cognitive functions models i.e. Men with **T*. For women, most have a highly positioned feeling function in the 1^st or 2nd positions in their cognitive functions model i.e., women with **F* personality types.

Men in Societies in general don’t have a proper outlet for their emotions. They just consume what makes them feel good but don’t express clearly the emotions they feel. This leads to a low level of emotional intelligence, incapacity to understand the emotional reactions of women, and bottling up the toxic impact of negative emotions[20], [21]. Men who express their anger usually don’t express sadness as they see it as a sign of weakness and vulnerability that goes against their masculinity and the power that they want to show to their environment[22]–[25]. Women have the predisposition to express their emotions among other females and selectively towards men [26]–[28], and to even emphasize them to get what they want. So, they can become manipulative and abuse their emotional intelligence to their advantage against other men and women[29]–[34]. Similarly, men can abuse their managerial positions and their clarity of thinking against other women and men, but they are weaker than women on an emotional level.

Cristopher & Catja

Let’s take, for example, an ESFJ guy in the “Love is Blind Sweden” Season 1. His name is Cristopher and has a dominant Extroverted feeling Fe in his 1st Cognitive function and a lower thinking function Introverted thinking Ti as his 4th function. Thanks to his Introverted intuition, Ni, in 2nd position, he can understand and process complex…

To be continued

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